
Children’s books for “right” minded patriots!
Our new “Florida’s Official Guide To” series was specifically written to pass the stringent review process in school libraries in the great states of Florida, Texas, Idaho, and more! They’re certain to be a favorite of patriotic children everywhere.
Endorsed by Gov G. Santos himself!



Statement of Regulatory Compliance
In accordance with the laws of Texas, Idaho, Florida and sometimes Mississippi, we affirm that these books do NOT contain sexual material, including, but not limited to:
- Horn-dogging
- Frontal lobotomy
- Sipping wine at 3pm
- Bottom Billy’s
- Spoonful of cream pie
- Amish snowball fights
- Cowgirl dewdrops
- Steamed chowder
- Trombone slide
- Eggs over easy

3-in-1! Florida’s Official Guide To: Real Families(tm) Making Babies with Harriet Tubman
Includes bonus book: ABC’s Homeschool Edition!
Parents LOVE our Florida’s Official Guides To
“Definitely buying a copy for all the local schools. Maybe even a church library or two!”
“What the hell am I even reading?”


